Read Comments

Getting Back to The Source


This summer I went back to The Source

In fact, I’m here now, basking in the glory of mountain views and island breeze; waking up to smiling faces and the rhythm of the swaying trees. 

Summer school hasn’t started yet and so far it feels a lot like a retreat or rehabilitation from the outside world. I’ve been eating 3 meals a day with freshly squeezed juice in a community setting with people from the US, UK, Europe and of course, my beautiful island. I don’t think I have ever really spent time in a community living situation before, apart from the short time I went to visit my partner in California last year; but if I were to imagine it, this is exactly what I envision. 

Have you ever gone somewhere and just felt immediately at home? At peace? Not just comfortable and welcomed, but truly like you are, and have always been, a part of it? That is what I am feeling. I have been to the Source twice before, and each time the lull of the trees has always spoken to me—I just wasn’t ever here long enough to sit with them and hear their message. Being here now for four days has made me recognise that I am the Source, and the Source is me. The Source is all of us who are here; all the children who have been touched by Maria and Keisha over the years, who greet them with pure glee in the streets as we walk through the town. The Source is the beautiful children who run around these mountain tops like they’ve never been anything else but an extension of the land. The Source is all the people who find their way here from all walks of life, and who keep coming back time and again so they always remember. 

If love at first sight applies also to places, then I knew I found it here 1.5 years ago. Although, more accurately, this would be love at first feel. On an instinctual level, and without overthought, we sentient beings know love when we feel it. I am so grateful that the love of this land brought me back here for the summer to be part of and connect with these beautiful people. I am glad that I choose to crawl out of my shell when I am called to grow, and that it allows me to have experiences like these. I had contemplated coming here pretty much up until I arrived, because I have some newfound obligations to tend to for the next step of my journey. (That’s for another blog in the near future.) I felt I wasn’t prioritising right and that I shouldn’t even be in Jamaica right now, let alone for the whole summer. But of course something kept pulling me. I couldn’t fully convince myself not to come, even though it seemed like the more practical option. I wasn’t really sure what I was being called to do, but, of course, I knew that whatever it was, I would find myself doing it. And so, here I am. 

I was asked yesterday by a kindred soul where I’d prefer to live: on the beach, or in the mountains. This is a question I have been asking myself ever since I can remember. As most of you know, I am 100% a water baby. The ocean has always beckoned to me, drawing me in with her sparkling light, her infinite mysteries, and receding tide. There has always been something magical to me about gliding gracefully through infinite pulsating hydrogen and oxygen molecules; but it was mostly the silence that got me. There’s no escaping yourself when you submerge into that kind of stillness. All that matters then is you, your breath, and mama. I suppose this is why I’ve always been attracted to silence; and so of course I have tended to lean more toward living by the ocean. But I am finding that there is a stillness up here in the mountains too. It’s just that it’s a stillness that matches your own. Unlike in the ocean where silence is the only option, up here you get the illusion of choice. Either you slow down and let it fill you, or you stay long enough until you have no choice but to become it. 

So after years of being on the fence, and with the help of this beautiful space, I have finally decided that the quietness of the mountains is where I’d make my home; where I would allow myself to be. 

I am the leaves on the trees as they make their sounds in the wind. I am the wildflowers that grow through the gravel and the insects that don’t stay outside. I am the moonlight that guides us home at night, and the peenie wallies that watch from the bushes as we walk by. I am the crickets that sing us to sleep. I am the morning rain that wakes up the Earth. I am the mountains that actually chose me, long before I ever manifested in the flesh. 

There is nowhere else I’d rather be right now.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.

epson ecotank model comparisoncosmonaut stylusyuneec breeze specschke stocktrxadenyse plowaltstockblozfgetscanner commsi gs70 stealth pro pricejnug premarket chartamd 580xticc stocksony x900e 49 inchalienware amplifier benchmarkzte b2017gcoinsheethyperdocklivestreamzturtle beach xp400 xbox onevzw com paybillqnap crashplanpdlb stockivpaf stockxbr65x900e pricebjri stock pricegoogleplaydealsnyse pjtmlnt stockhyperkin smartboyduluth trading stock pricebbma channelqcpclacdfamavfnugt stock splitcdor stockvizio sound bar cracklingmchp stock price todayadxs newssony digital paper dpt s1lgv20 battery lifeasus ux360ua ds51tht nt5 troubleshootingasus q324 reviewsamsung np740u5metak stockgarageband rap vocalsmulesoft ipo pricenvax stockfitbit sleep apnea patternidxg stocktwitssony bdp s7200wdfc stocksophiris stockfnhiu3415w vs u3417wflks stocksony xbr65x900e reviewsony vpccw21fx batterymakemkv ubuntuhololens spectator viewfreef stockgalaxy s6 s voice wake up commandmovband 3tweakbit reviewr weedstockswstl stock pricekohls ticker symbollenovo y510p specssamsung galaxy j36vwww ibtx combokf stockcpvnfzogenix stock pricetipo de cambio dolar peso mexicano hoyfnovamindhorn netflixcprxsunglass emoji snaplg pw800m2875dwhow to reboot fitbit altatvix quotevívosmart hr reviewi7378 dellsvu bullseyebackblaze pricingnyse wecwifi calling galaxy s5 at&tliveintentyonomi alexasamsung galaxy js3dyson amo9airvpn androidtertill weeding robotgdgieee box b202 specsjawbone up24 price drophp photosmart c4180 all in one driver macsfm tickeritub3cyhhzdimension c521 memorylg sh2 soundbar reviewsequans stockgizmonic institute patchimarketslive loginqcom stock price todayasus x200ma kx643dhudl sound problemsgrim fandango trophy guidemarsbotlg 65uh7700 pricebenq bl2710ptplaystation vue nba finalsplayerfactorycorelnglynyse vcrasu3 00001kbwyinstall expressvpn on firestickopiant pharmaceuticals stock pricemg248q reviewzotac en1080omhe stocksrpt earningspnra panerabread commyhi stockabtl stock pricehaida variable nd filtersamsung mu6070tradfri appnasdaq aptinasdaq clirviewsonic pjd7828hdl reviewunable to write to library iphoto libraryvxus etfambuja cement share pricemc916ll apsglqblto stocknasdaq kopnfenx stockmass effect andromeda where to buy augmentationspgsynetgear nighthawk x4 r7500v2epaznyse fltggn stock priceadxs stock pricetegpmcrb stocknephros incsfun stock pricenetgear nighthawk ac2300 reviewff15 salescozi tv on fioskloth dnsswiffer wet jet pads how to put ongimo stock pricedofmasterzumz stockivobbrother hl 2340dw driverryzen threadripper 1950xcreative sound blaster recon3d thx pcie sound carddalmia sugar share pricedell xps m1730 17 gaming laptopqcom stock price todaytlys stocknasdaq sndsienergylit etf holdingsnasdaq cdnaasus rt ac68whsic stock price todaymkndnasdaq urbnduolingo valyriansumeet industries share priceffmgf stockammj stock pricenasdaq prtospotflux free vpnrlgt stock priceregeneron stock pricecotação do dólar de hojenyse uaasamurai bandit crosswordshockz headphonesnasdaq wdayrtpt channeltwitch hearthstone overlaysgen stock pricenyse rjfm3e1hsgxworx wg794hwcc stocknasdaq abmdcan you watch the superbowl on sling tvswiffer wet jet pads how to put onnyse bllnyse bahcore i7 3970x laptopnvidia shield tv antutu benchmarkfuyao glass wikieflnnyse rgrsglb stocknasdaq achcvlkafsophiris stockbilicam89th academy awards live streamwtba stocktrulink wirelessdell buys alienware pricesepllcytr websitehp deskjet 2541 all in one printer copier scannersling tv nesndual monoblock lnbstock crbpstartmail reviewkitov pharmaceuticalsonedrive placeholdersipvanish tap driversalienware mx18 pricevedanta share price nsenyse rngdl4100donutgateetrm stock after hoursdmde for macxbox 1s 500gbcunbnyse htgcacer r13 touchscreen 2 in 1 chromebookpreço do dolar hoje no brasilsuper nintendo entertainment system sns 101rdfn stock priceddrt medicaltylt 2 pack portable power banksend snapcashsyprpbpb stock priceepson wf 2760 reviewsyrs stockroadblocks ps4xop stock pricecronusmax best buynasdaq ifonnetobjects fusion 2013 1&1 editionnyse ftkhdawlilak stocknyse uaazcastttph stock pricenfp chartingnasdaq trstradionomy reviewjawbone up5kodak orbit360floogals youtubesr241encephalophonenasdaq ctrpnvgs stockrmrkwiicadenasdaq agioasus zenbook ux510lgcypburr brown pcm1798creative sound blaster recon3d thx pcie sound cardomnidisksweeper reviewncty stockwdoethld stock newssony 65 930dvalerian the new future trilogystraight talk apn for galaxy s4sony 65x900ekdmn stocklpnt stockedimax ew 7822uacrgbptxrc stocklg 55uh7700 pricedrys ihubphilips bdp350240fs3750acer xg270hu 144hz 27.0 monitorkffbbgmd stockgbghnyse frcadbe tickercalithera biosciences stockfrlfjamn stockhakchi 2.11cloudapps sumomacbook pro mll42ll awafminstall expressvpn on firestickmodn stock pricesamsung w2017 amazonhalfords dab radio fittingpolar v800 open waterm277c6brandsmart televisionsholy stone quadcopter f181nyse htzcomix zone emulatorrdus stockmeagan foster dishonoredwhere can i buy a papplemobileye tickertcl 55s405 reviewnasdaq rgsenasdaq anthnyse nnnlvclyue boom 2 speaker appnyse wbsholy stone f181 rc quadcopter dronedts truvolumevizio sb3851 cosppi stockagtc stockipvanish compatible routerssennheiser hd 4.50 btnc reviewlqmtvr apps for cynocularsrcii stock pricegarmin drivesmart 61 lmt s 6.95ibm acquires kenexanubkipx7 meaningdell u2917w reviewvizio smartcast 38 2.1 sound bar systemblackweb battery packleviton decora smart switchturtle beach recon 50x mic not workinglgv20 reviewios torrenting apporexigen therapeutics stock pricenasdaq usakhrzn stock